Discovering beauty part 2

Hey how have you all been?
 Today I'm going to continue on our journey to discovering beauty.. (I'm sorry for letting you wait this long) If you haven't read the first part please check it out before reading this one, so that you can understand this one better. Click here.
Now I'm going to go on with part 2.

So I had to start accepting myself as beautiful.. I think it was the hardest thing i ever had to do. How can you just start loving yourself after hating yourself for so long? Honestly it's just impossible or maybe it isn't..
Let me give you guys a few tips on how to actually gain confidence. Some might seem stupid, but trust me they actually help.. A LOT !!

1) Surround yourself with the right crowd. Whether you like it or not people influence you constantly. If you're around people who are constantly talking negative about you, how do you expect to become positive? Again it's not impossible, but negativity will just make it harder to stay positive. It shouldn't be the group of people with the newest make-up or the people with the strictest diets, it's the ones with the positive mindset. The ones who will encourage you to achieve your goal at all costs!!

2) Never give up!! I know this is obvious and we all know this one, but actually try to do it!!

3) Wake up every morning stand in front of the mirror and call yourself pretty. I know this is a very childish one, but it does work.. if you do this for some time, you will start to believe it..

4) IGNORE NEGATIVE COMMENTS!!! They're all lies. The people who say negative things about you are usually jealous or they're just being childish and most of the time they don't even know you, so don't let they're comments affect you.

5) Please don't try to hide your face behind layers of make-up!! I know make-up is nice and we like to use it, but girl: you are also beautiful without it!! if you're using make-up to "cover up flaws" lemme tell you this: it's not working and you're waisting time and money! If you want to wear make-up: okay, but make sure your reason is not to "cover the flaws".

Okay so here are  tips to start with.. It's not always an easy journey, but the journey really is worth it!
I wish you all a lovely and blessed Friday!!

~Musa

the little bird

Trapped..

 In a cage.

Not knowing how to escape the cage. Yet I keep trying..

I managed.

Next thing is to get to the window.

I get caught again and put into my cage..

I don’t give up and keep trying.

I try again and I manage again..

This time I get to the window.

I try to open it, I can already smell the fresh cold air outside, 

I’ve almost opened it,

 but I’m too slow…

I get caught and put into my cage again.

Third time, good time…

But how?

How can I escape my cage?

How can I break free and fly along with the other birds?

When will I breathe the fresh air outside?

For now all I know is that one day I will break free and fly with them,

But when?

Discovering beauty part 1

Hey everyone, how have u been?
Okay today I'm going to talk about beauty and self love, but before you continue reading this one, make sure you've read the story that came before this to understand this post. To read the story klick here.

Now that you've read the story you can continue reading this post...

Now this seems like a really silly story, but we actually experience such stories every day. 

We ask ourselves: 

Why are my legs so ugly? Why is my tummy so big? 

Why isn’t my nose shaped like that other nose?  Why don’t I have the perfect eyebrow game? 

Why don’t I hardly have any eyebrows?
Lol, for the people who go through this one: I know the struggle is real.

Why doesn’t that dress look good on me like it did on my friend? Why can’t I be like this one? 

And I can go on and on with questions, but you guys know what I’m trying to say. 

I remember when I was younger I would ask my self so many on those questions that I listed above. 

I really used to get bothered by them. Even know some of the questions still haunt me, 

but just as my mum told my sister: are we crisps? Does it really matter how we look?

Do we really have to change ourselves to be perfect? 

Do we really need the plastic surgery or the extreme diets?

Okay I understand that when you are not healthy, you need to go on a HEALTHY diet and become healthy.

When I was in 1 year of secondary school (1st year of middle school or in some countries grade 7)I used to feel awful about myself.
I used to be laughed at very often. 

They would call me fat and ugly.
They would insult me because of my braids and my clothes.
They would exclude me and tell me that they don’t like me, even if they didn’t know me, just because I looked the way I did.

I used to feel so bad. I didn’t have many friends back then.. 

People would be fake to me a lot of times. 

The few friends I had, would be scared to come up for me,

because they didn’t want to get teased themselves and I understood it, but I felt really bad..

It got so bad that in my 2nd year I started binging. I wouldn’t eat at all during the day 

and when I’d come home I’d eat like a horse.. I did that for 6-7 months, I just kept telling people I was on a diet or that I’d eaten already.

 Instead of loosing weight, I gained a lot and the teasing continued.

 I felt so bad at a certain point, 

that I didn’t even want to live any more.I hated school, I hated everything. 

At home they also noticed me gaining weight and my parents
started telling me to watch what I eat, that made me feel even worse.

They didn’t know that I didn’t eat at all during lunch, they just assumed that I ate,

because I used to pack my own lunch and my sisters’. So they thought I ate, while I’d only pack my sisters’ lunch and go to school like that. 

Sometimes I’d pack for myself, but I just wouldn’t eat it.

 By then I made some friends and they kept telling me to eat, but I just couldn’t. 

In my 3rd year I stopped binging.

 They would be days when I’d forget to pack my lunch (like seriously forget, not faking it),

 but then my friends would scold me and tell me to eat whatever was there..
So we’d share lunches very often, because I just couldn’t get used to making lunch for myself. 

In my 5th year I finally started eating normally. 

My class was much kinder, so I wasn’t teased that much and I had more friends..

I really enjoyed going to school and I reflected on myself a lot during that year (this was last year btw).

I really thought about my actions and what was right and what was wrong
and how I could improve myself.
I figured that if I really wanted to loose weight I should do it for myself and do it properly! If I really wanted to be happy I had to get myself together and start looking at myself differently. I had to try and convince myself of my own beauty, but how?

But okay this post is getting too long, so I’ll write a part 2 soon. :) 

keep this in mind though: 

 

Lots of love,

~Meli, Mita and Musa

BACIB part 7: Faith or Fear

It has been a while hasn't it? Okay today I would really love to share something I realised just recently.
Some time ago I wasn't really feeling myself. I would have so many mood swings and wouldn't understand why. I would have so many negative thoughts and saw no hope in anything that was going on. I would isolate myself from the people whom I trusted most and go talk to others, just because I didn't want to bother them with my problems while they probably had problems of their own. I felt like if I would they wouldn't understand me either, why would they if even I don't understand myself?? I really didn't get why I was acting that way. I shut myself completely out without saying a word to them. I'm really the worst. Up till last Sunday I didn't understand why I was acting that way.

 I didn't even want to find out why. I just ignored everything and just lived on. For the first time in life I ran away from a problem, I was enjoying the current situation so I just let it be and went on.. It was strange, because I hate running away from my problems. It's just not me at all. The more time went by the more I realised I wasn't me. I was far from Musa. I really wasn't Musa at all. I really didn't know how to deal with it or change it. I just went along with the flow and ignored the fact that I had started hurting others. I really didn't care. For the first time I thought I was thinking of myself and just let everything slide.. I wasn't making sense at all. What started as let me not tell and by that not hurt others ended up being, let me enjoy myself without caring about others. I saw their pain and still I didn't do anything. I didn't know what to do. I just didn't get myself..

Last Sunday the title of the message was "Behold the man" based on John 19:4. It was all about behold, now the literal meaning of behold = see, observe,.. It was about Jesus who was man and God at the same time. They looked at 3 different things that Jesus did where you could see that He was man AND God.It was also about faith and fear. Faith= the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. Fear= your doubt, your distraction. (This part is just to help you understand the symbolics and the rest of the story)
Between everything that was said I realised something: I had to behold myself and see where I went wrong. You know that when you're scared or when you're strong, it's a choice that u consciously make? Yeah well.. Here you go if you didn't know (what I didn't either before I heard the message) I realised that my feeling down and loosing hope was a choice that I made. I chose for fear over faith. I was running away because I was scared and I knew that I couldn't do it myself. I don't know why I let it slip my mind that God doesn't want you to do it yourself. I don't know where my faith went to. Sometimes choosing fear seems the easiest thing to do, but trust me the easy way always turns out harder than the difficult way. I don't know why I didn't just go to my friends and tell them the truth from the beginning. I didn't only loose faith in general, but also in my friends. This is the worst thing I've ever done, because loosing faith in life and friends, to me it's like loosing faith in God, because God works through other people and through different circumstances.


Conclusion: always be aware of what you choose: faith or fear? The way you can make sure that you always make the right choice, is by making sure that your foundation is right!! If you are a believer, you have to make sure u know and understand enough of the Word, so that you can stand firmly in your faith and know on what your faith is based! Keep practising your faith and keep growing in faith, so that your choices will be made based on the truth! Even if you don't believe make sure you check your choices and make sure that they are based on the truth. On top of that, be honest to yourself and others ( lol I'm saying this cause it will really help you.. I also had to get real with myself and now I also have to be honest with others..) I'm not saying this like its easy please don't take it that way it really isn't. Like no way.. Some times you'll go through things the hard way, but that always results to the best!

~Musa

I would do such a thing!?!

Okay, today I'm going to finish the story I wrote last week: "I never thought that..." So if you haven't read that one yet, go and read that first before you read this.

She told me that she had gone on a date with him, but she didn't expect the date to end the way it did.
They went for a walk and talked and laughed. After that, they went to his house. She told me: "he told me that his house wasn't far and that we could go and rest there for a bit before I go home. So I went. When I reached there and entered the house I felt a little strange. His bed was in the living room, he told me that was because they didn't have enough rooms, so yeah. Then he told me to sit down and I sat on the chair next to the bed, then he started asking me to join him on the bed an sit next to him. After denying quite a few times, I gave in and laid myself on the bed next to him.. It was extremely awkward. I really didn't know what to do.. He started tickling me and touching me.. I didn't know what to think of it all.. I told him to stop, but it just escalated from there. The next thing I noticed was that he was on me trying to take y clothes off.. I told him to stop and tried to get off the bed, but he pushed me back on it.. I told him that I didn't like it and that he should really stop and get off me, but he didn't. He took all my clothes off and started touching me. I felt really uncomfortable and really hated the way he was acting. I tried my best to get him off me, but he was too strong. I kept resisting, but nothing worked. I felt so helpless. I thought of my morals and boundaries that I was crossing with this. All of a sudden, I felt a lot of pain. It hurt so much, I had never felt such pain before. I told him to stop, but he just wouldn't. The pain just got worse and I didn't know what to do. I felt so powerless. I couldn't do anything to stop him and he just kept going. It was so frustrating. I just gave in.. After some time he finally stopped and I went home. I was so scared. I kept wondering how I could explain this at home and to my friends. And what if.. what if.. no no no that can't be...

Moral of the story:
Sometimes you make mistakes that you didn't want to make, in this case it was the fact that she went to his house without knowing him well or knowing what was going to happen. You should always stick to your morals and keep your boundaries and never give in! If you suspect something strange always try to talk to someone about it before something happens. If something happens don't give up or loose hope, learn from it and become stronger!

For this post even if it isn't a BACIB I have a song too:

Warrior by Demi Lovato 

~Musa